The Call

Disclaimer: This may be long. Get a treat, pull up your chair and read on...

I have decided that before I start writing about my experiences in Nigeria, I need to inform everyone out in cyberspace about how I have been called to go.  Some of you may know my story, and others may be totally confused thinking that Nigeria might be in India somewhere, seeing as that is originally where I was planning on serving.  Don't worry, you're not crazy, you do know your geography and Nigeria is in fact in Africa and that is where I will be living for the next 5 months. So now, Ill let story time begin.

About 9 months ago I set out on a 2 week missions trip to El Salvador to serve at an orphanage with Potter's Field Ministries, it was there that I met and instantly loved 9 complete strangers.  There was a leadership team from SEND Ministries that we were going to be partnering with for our 2 week stay and throughout our time together we served, worshipped, had devotional times, ate and lived life in true community.  These 9 were from Vista, California and it was just amazing to see how God brought us all together in a foreign country, hundreds of miles away from home.  It was in El Salvador that I felt the Lord calling me back to the mission field. I have always been drawn to serving and living in the midst of a culture completely different then my own and allowing the Holy Spirit to unify in ways that only He can. 

When I came back home from El Salvador, I had some specific prayers that I lifted up to the Lord.  To be honest, it's been a battle for me to really believe that God has called me out again.  So, I had to make sure that God really wanted me to go and that it wasn't of my own desires.  Once God revealed and showed me that in fact He had answered my prayers, I was presented with 2 options for serving, one was a trip to Nigeria and the other India, both were with the leaders that I had met in El Salvador.  Now, here is where this all gets very interesting, I hope you are paying attention and once I say what I am going to say, please promise me you won't hold it against me.  This is me being very vulnerable with anyone who is still reading... OK, I jumped on the trip to India because, well frankly I have never wanted to go to Africa, I've never had the desire to actually live in Africa and shot me for saving this, but I just hadn't had a heart for Africa.  I know what you're thinking, "Who doesn't love Africa?!!??" Me, I am a heartless and selfish being that up until a few months ago would have rather traveled everywhere else in the world, but Africa. 

If you are not overly offended and you're still reading, I promise the story gets better.  Most of you probably guessed it, my India trip was cancelled!  Go figure... So, when I got word that the trip I was preparing for was cancelled, I had a mild heart attack and began instantly trying to figure out what my next step was going to be.  I do like to take matters into my own hands.  In my mind still Africa was not an option, I had informed my team coordinator that I would prayerfully consider joining the team to Nigeria, but in my heart I was already playing out every other scenario.  At this point, I had already given my notice at my job.  For those of you who don't know, I've spent the last 2 years working in the Youth Department at my church and its been the most amazing experience for me and I've loved every moment I've been there.  Danny and Nitsa, if you're reading this- I truly have been blessed in every way for being able to serve under you and you have taught me so much.  Thank you for being the best boss ever!! 

So, if you can't tell by now, leaving my job is hard for me.  I loved doing what I did, but I knew God was calling me to other things, maybe even higher  grounds.  With my notice in, I thought about the possibilities of humbling myself to say I made a mistake and with drawl my notice, but the perfect person came to replace me (Teresa, I know you are going to do an amazing job) and I knew that my time at the church was coming to an end.  The day I realized this, Africa was still a distant thought, I honestly had no idea what God was going to do or where He was going to send me, but I knew it wasn't going to be Africa!!  That night at home fellowship, I came with a heavy heart and no one really knew what was going on with me.  All of this happened in a matter of days, but to me it felt like months.  I was so confused and discouraged, I thought that God was calling me to new things but maybe I was wrong.  During worship that night at home fellowship, God's presence was thick in the room and I felt grateful to be in the presence of the Father.  In the middle of worship, our Pastor takes a magazine from the coffee table and starts reading an article.  The article was about a Christian man who was formerly a Muslim and how he use to kill hundreds of Christians, he hated Christians and one day God got a hold of his heart.  He gave his life to the Lord and became a Pastor and has been serving Jesus ever since.  But, this conversion came with great persecution.  He had his house invaded and his families lives threatened and in the end, one of his sons was murdered.  The article was from a magazine called Voice of the Martyrs, subscribe and learn more if you are compelled to. 

At this time, I am on my knees before the Lord and all I'm thinking about is how I desire to help those people, I want to be a vessel and a light of God's love in a culture where darkness reigns.  While Mike (the Pastor) is speaking and sharing, he informs us that this is a Nigeria Pastor and he starts praying for the church of Nigeria.  Now I don't know what you're thinking right now, but maybe something along the lines of..."WHAT!! No way!! That's no coincidence!!" I know my God and I know He is not a God of coincidence.  He is a God of divine appointments and He knew exactly what I needed to hear that night.  There are 195 countries in this world, and that night while I was on my knees, heavy hearted and down cast, God revealed and called me out.  That night one country was the topic of conversation, one country was being lifted up in prayer, and one country out of 195 God revealed His heart for.  Nigeria was imprinted on my heart and the Lord spoke, just like in Isaiah "Whom shall I send?" so I answered Him, "I will go for You."

There you have it.  Sorry this is so long and drawn out, but every detail is vital and every word means something.  Hopefully you still have some of your treat left to enjoy and I pray that you feel more near to me.  This was my call to Nigeria.

beginning stages of a blogger...

Hello to everyone and anyone who is about to embark on this journey with me.  I'm new at blogging and I am not the best typer, writer or communicator, so in advanced...I apologize for all the misspelled words, grammatical errors or anything else that might cause the perfectionist in you to scream at me.

For those of you reading this, you are most likely a close friend or family and someone who is praying for me and financially supporting me with this call that God has placed on my life.  Before I start rambling on let me say THANK YOU.  Without your love and support I wouldn't be sitting here, preparing to leave in 5 short weeks and dreaming with expectation of what the next 5 months hold for me.

I titled this blog "BE NEAR" based off of my favorite Psalm.  Psalm 73:28 says, "But as for me, the nearness of God is my good.." and a few verses earlier the Psalmist writes, "my heart and my flesh may fail, but God is my strength and portion forever." My hopes is that while I blog and write and share all that God is doing and showing me in Nigeria, that these words would become evident in my life and I pray in yours as well.  Also, this blog is created with the purpose of having you feel near to me and I to you.  Though we will be thousands of miles apart, I want to share with you how God is moving in Nigeria and my desire is that I would be a vessel, an ambassador, a bridge of knowledge for you to truly SEE & even experience God's love for the people of Nigeria.

I'm humbled and grateful for all the love that has been poured out to me over the years.  I'm excited to start this journey and absolutely stoked to share it with  you!! 

Thank you Father for allowing me, for choosing me and for calling me to go.